Pursuing Resilience

March 5th, 2026
by Bob Crittenden

When we are in a position of trusting God with all of our hearts, we can learn to look to Him and His love and faithfulness, rather than look to the world to get our needs met. We can see beyond circumstances and recognize His presence with us in our circumstances. By looking to Jesus, the author and finisher of our faith, as Hebrews 12 says, we can possess a sense of resilience - an inner strength and ability to bounce back when we feel defeated or discouraged. Hebrews 12 (ESV) contains these words:
1 Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us,
2 looking to Jesus, the founder and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy that was set before him endured the cross, despising the shame, and is seated at the right hand of the throne of God.

Lay aside. Run with endurance. Looking to Jesus. These are powerful concepts, which are building blocks for resilience.

The Barna Group, though, has found that families are not practicing or experiencing a sense of resilience. In a summary of recent survey data, we can find these words:

Only 1 in 7 married parents meet Barna’s criteria for resilience, highlighting how rare sustained family resilience is today.
Resilient families are not spared from conflict or hardship; they are more likely to practice repair, seek support and remain connected to supportive communities.
Shared practices and consistent engagement beyond the household—including faith-based rhythms for some families—help reinforce emotional, relational and spiritual bonds at home.

What are Barna's criteria for resilience? There are four:

Shared values and beliefs that guide family life
Open and healthy communication between spouses
A deep emotional connection within the marriage
Active engagement in community or faith-based practices beyond the household

Only 14% of married couples display all 4. Most - 36% - only display 1. The data shows that resilient families are devoted to repair, will seek out support, and reach "beyond the household."

Not too long ago, Danny Huerta, Vice-President of Family and Youth for Focus on the Family, discussed the ministry's new resource called, "Built for Resilience." Its website says that, "The core of this curriculum has been used internationally for nearly two decades and the changes in families and communities have been incredible. We also know it works because it is a biblically based curriculum. Parents will discover and apply the Five Foundational Rhythms of the Christian Home, which foster spiritual, mental, emotional, and relational health." There are also 40 Developmental Assets from the Search Institute that are taught in the curriculum. You can learn more from the Focus website.

Life certainly presents its share of challenges, and we need the Lord and we need each other. And, the "each other" can certainly be our family members. And, if the family is fractured, then the Church ideally should be available to help provide strength and wisdom.

But, the enemy is hard at work trying to destroy the lives of Christians and delude believers from trusting in God. He will attempt to divide us, even from the ones closest to us. We have to be determined to not be, as the Bible says, "ignorant of His schemes." But, even when we encounter difficulties, Biblical resilience means that we can trust the Lord to enable us to walk through them and learn what He desires to teach us.

There is much at stake, and families may feel fractured or frustrated. It is great to know there is a Healer in whom we can place our trust.

Posted in The Front Room